Anka Radakovich was a wedding and you will matchmaking specialist and an authorized sexologist. The woman is will believed the original modern intercourse columnist due to this lady groundbreaking column for the Info journal.
Providing an identity try is actually a fun method of getting better along with your lover. Starting the test together should be enlightening, because you read and this characteristics was compatible, and you will those that get on for each other people’s nerves. Identifying characteristics helps two of you determine what you want that you know, also it will get give a shock or a couple of.
What is the Enneagram Identity Test?
The Enneagram try classifies the human mind to the nine unique groups, that is used in facts motivations and people behavior.
The Enneagram Identity attempt was first produced from inside the 1915 Russia, by the George Gurdjieff, a great philosopher and professor which one is before his time about “self-help business.” Regarding later 1960’s, professor Oscar Ichazo put 9 personalities toward an enthusiastic “Enneagram, and this bankrupt off emotional and you can behavioural areas of for each and every identity attribute.” It was followed closely by Claudio Naranjo, MD, and other modern psychologists inside Berkeley, California just who joint this new Enneagram towards the latest browse to advance the world of psychology.
Which one Are you?
You’ll find nine identity systems, and lots of somebody have a tendency to exhibit 2 or three of these characteristics, but usually you to character sorts of exists regarding take to. He or she is 1.) New “Perfectionist” that is mental and idealistic, dos.) New “Caregiver” who’s of use and you can caring, step 3.) The new “Performer” who’s imaginative and you will extroverted, cuatro.) The new “Individualist” who artistic and you will non-conforming, 5.) The brand new “Investigator” who is intense and you will cynical, 6.) The new “Loyalist”, that is in charge and you can secure, seven.) Brand new “Adventurer” who is spontaneous and you can playful, 8.) The fresh “Challenger” who is notice-convinced and you can dominating, “and you may nine.) The latest “Peacemaker” who’s agreeable and easygoing.
Pair #1: The brand new Talkative Extrovert therefore the Silent Introvert
State, including the spouse is a beneficial #8 identity, that is very challenging, outgoing, and you may talkative, along with her husband is the silent type of, a #5 who often times will get aggravated by their wife’s cam talk speaking. She wants to discuss however, him, not really much. “This is so preferred,” states Jessica Baum, an authorized Psychological state Counselor and founder of your Relationships Institute for the Hand Coastline, Fl. “We have been keen on individuals with more and regularly opposite attributes from our individual. That usually starts as a best part, but as relationship evolves it’s normal as frustrated by the latest attributes i shortly after fell deeply in love with. This is how she observes that it convo looking like: Him: “Your ideas are important to me and i need to chat, however, immediately I have to decompress. “It is necessary,” she tells follow through having something such as “What about after-dinner?” or “Let us is actually the next day mid-day, while i are going to be completely establish.” (If only we could be therefore progressed.) “Meanwhile”, she jokes, she will lean a little on the girfriends which display their ‘current away from gab.’”
Jessica Baum, LMHC, Limit, is the holder and you can originator off Matchmaking Institute regarding Hand Coastline. She obtained an student training out-of Fordham University and contains an excellent Master’s degree inside mental health counseling of Southern area University.
Partners #2: The Caregiver Kid together with Alpha Females
Think various other few. He’s the sort #2 caregiver beneficial variety of, with his #3 Adventurer wife desires a lot more of an alpha male identification, and regularly manages to lose regard for him since “man” in the matchmaking. Why does she obtain value for him, given that he’s not planning changes?
“It is much harder,” says Baum, as she is looking to change your unlike turning to just who he’s. If escort Fort Worth you want your partner become something they aren’t, you have got to wonder why. This type of identity occupies a good amount of space from one to masculine opportunity,” she states., hence will not allow it to be a lot to possess your. However, if he or she is an effective caregiver and you can helpful, those individuals was wonderful qualities. Work at welcome off functions away from just what the guy does have. She can pull herself straight back a small on the leader character, which can free-space to greatly help him action to the you to definitely role either. She may also run softening particular, calling their feminine opportunity, along with stopping one issues she possess throughout the need handle. Reverse characters interest, and can both learn from both.”
Partners #3: Brand new Performer plus the Low-Artist
He’s the kind #step three “performer” sorts of and always needs to be the middle of notice, he’s the opposite, a beneficial #5 introvert. How can you help both do your individual material whenever one of your the guy generally seems to you want that kind of attract, possibly regarding anyone else?
“If one companion has no an issue with additional becoming the middle of appeal, upcoming that is ok,” states Baum. “It’s problematic when he or she is not expose for others and concerned about are heart stage. If the she doesn’t have an issue with it, after that she can reason herself rather than constantly signup your. She does not have any to participate your dangling with his members of the family. I generate individuals with brand new destroyed characteristics out-of our selves,” she states. When the he loves to communicate with men and women and socialize and you will she will not, and here a compromise is wanted to get their demands met. Permitting one another know after you thinking about messaging and you will talking along with your family unit members is useful she claims. “Being deliberate in advance will help get the balance thus both people obtain demands met.”